Will the humans never learn? Things should not be left where I can get them.
This time it was jelly beans! Two pounds of gourmet jelly beans to be exact! Dad asked Mom to buy them because he likes sweets almost as much as I do. They were left where they shouldn't have been - on the nightstand.
And so I feasted. I think the strawberry flavoured ones are my favourite. Or maybe the green apple. But I also like the buttered popcorn ones and the espresso ones and the banana ones and the pina colada ones... heck, I love them all. I thoroughly enjoyed a sweet morning.
But then... oh dear, oh my... my tummy lurched and rolled and flippity-flopped and then - SPEW - my jelly beans came up. I lurched and heaved and emptied my stomach's contents on the bed, on the hardwood floor, on the dog beds, on the carpet, on the side of the couch and on the carpet a few more times. I'm not sure why but at that point I became incredibly thirsty and had to drink nearly all of our water in the giant bowl. Then that all came up on the carpet, too.
Dad was the first one home. He sent a text to Mom who was at work with several hours left to go in her 12 hour shift. Mom worked for another hour or so but she couldn't concentrate on police department stuff. All she could think about was cleaning up puke.
When Mom got home she sighed, filled a bucket with hot water, and proceeded to scrub. But the bad thing? The vomit was basically liquified sugar. It had the consistency of corn syrup having been poured out and left to dry. There was no getting that stuff out of the rug without a carpet shampooer. So, Mom went to Kohls and bought one.
The clean up went a little more quickly with the shampooer and, even though Mom still seems a little upset with me, I think she should be thanking me. You see, when she bought the carpet shampooer she also got some Kohls cash - that free money they give you for spending money - and with it she got a pretty new pair of shoes. In the long run I did her a favour!
This time it was jelly beans! Two pounds of gourmet jelly beans to be exact! Dad asked Mom to buy them because he likes sweets almost as much as I do. They were left where they shouldn't have been - on the nightstand.
And so I feasted. I think the strawberry flavoured ones are my favourite. Or maybe the green apple. But I also like the buttered popcorn ones and the espresso ones and the banana ones and the pina colada ones... heck, I love them all. I thoroughly enjoyed a sweet morning.
But then... oh dear, oh my... my tummy lurched and rolled and flippity-flopped and then - SPEW - my jelly beans came up. I lurched and heaved and emptied my stomach's contents on the bed, on the hardwood floor, on the dog beds, on the carpet, on the side of the couch and on the carpet a few more times. I'm not sure why but at that point I became incredibly thirsty and had to drink nearly all of our water in the giant bowl. Then that all came up on the carpet, too.
Dad was the first one home. He sent a text to Mom who was at work with several hours left to go in her 12 hour shift. Mom worked for another hour or so but she couldn't concentrate on police department stuff. All she could think about was cleaning up puke.
When Mom got home she sighed, filled a bucket with hot water, and proceeded to scrub. But the bad thing? The vomit was basically liquified sugar. It had the consistency of corn syrup having been poured out and left to dry. There was no getting that stuff out of the rug without a carpet shampooer. So, Mom went to Kohls and bought one.
The clean up went a little more quickly with the shampooer and, even though Mom still seems a little upset with me, I think she should be thanking me. You see, when she bought the carpet shampooer she also got some Kohls cash - that free money they give you for spending money - and with it she got a pretty new pair of shoes. In the long run I did her a favour!
RSS Feed
